I had a really hard time with this part of the engagement.
It wasn't hard thinking about accepting a proposal or wearing a ring as a symbol of our upcoming marriage...
...it was hard deciding how I felt about rings in general. Obviously the biggest factor in it all was the giant price tag that most rings come with! At the same time, I felt like this might be the one time when it's okay to own something so expensive. After a lot of thought, I came up with a few different "types" of ring that I might want to have:
1. The most expensive piece of jewelry I'll ever own- Yes, it might cost X number of months salary, but it would be the one exception in the thrifty wardrobe that I currently own. For (hopefully) 50+ years I could wear it to special events and on holidays then (also hopefully) pass it down to another member of the family.
2. The family heirloom- I loved the idea of wearing a symbol of many years of love between another couple in my or his family. The ring would have history and meaning, but it wouldn't necessarily be "mine."
3. The non-diamond- I started thinking about this option as I browsed the sites of jewelers. I liked the unique look that many colored stones offered and loved the difference in price when compared to a diamond :).
4. The eco-friendly/ socially conscious- I'll admit that thinking about possibly wearing a blood diamond or contributing to the sketchy diamond trade turned me off a bit. With so many great online resources, I saw that this as another great option.
What did Nate end up giving to me? Well, you'll have to come back for part 2!
What did factors did you consider before buying (or voicing your opinion on) a ring?
Posts
8 comments:
Clint and I wanted to get married, but didn't have thousands saved. We wanted to spend more on our home. Instead, he had gotten me an emerald, which was my dream stone. Sure diamonds are pretty, but like you mentioned, the blood diamond stuff bothered me and I didn't like the idea of him spending a ton of money on a diamond. For my band, I took one of my grandmother's rings with small diamonds in it and had it turned into a band.
I considered all of the things you mentioned but I got really hung up on the 4c's. I shouldn't have. A diamond ring is like a new car; it depreciates enormously as soon as you take it home no matter what the size of the rock or its properties. If you ever need to liquidate it, you will take a 70%-80% loss if you sell it to someone like Circa or a local jewelry store. If I had to do it again, we'd buy from an individual who wanted to get rid of a ring (like on eBay) rather than from a store. In my opinion, it's the only way to get a decent price on the ring.
I had some conflicted feelings about the ring too. For one, I don't really own expensive clothes or jewelry, so it felt like a diamond ring would be out of character for me. Two, I really really care about the symbol and not so much about the possession. I would have been fine with just a wedding band in fact, but then I heard Rob's side of it (the groom is often left out of these discussions). He said it was important for me to wear a more traditional style ring so that others would see it and easily see that I was married. Even though we are NOT old fashioned (and I admit it sounds kinda weird to write this), he liked the idea of buying a nice ring as a symbol that he can manage his finances and provide as a husband. He also wanted something that was well made and would last. In the end, he surprised me anyway so I didn't weigh in on the ring all that much, but I LOVE the one he got me. It wasn't cheap, but it also didn't make him broke. But what I love is that he spent the time picking it out himself. He thought about things that were important to me (not sticking out too far since I don't like when my rings get stuck on things) and also unique things that he liked. So that's our ring story. I can't wait to hear which option Nate went with.
I had a hard time deciding on the solitare option or the multi-stone option, I did not want to spend too much on it, but then I did because I wanted to love the ring for a long time! In the end my husband picked the best one, not the size but the quality and it seems to fit my hand and personal taste the best!
Well my now husband was very thrifty and spent 1/4 of what my ring was later appraised for! His parents have a family friend in South Africa and the three of them took a vacation there when we were dating. He had already bought the setting/ring with small side diamonds on a going out of business sale. He was looking for a Valentine's present but when he saw the ring with the same split design of my favorite necklace he had to get it. The ring was for a pear shaped diamond but he liked the marquise shape better. So when he was in Africa he was able to visit an actual diamond mine and see that it wasn't a blood diamond. And that's where he bought my center stone. Cutting out the middle man saved a lot of money and we were shocked when the ring appraised for 4 times as much as what he paid! I loved the split design so much I decided to not spend a lot of money on a custom wedding band.
Also on a side note marquise diamonds are proven to look larger than all of the other diamond shapes of the same weight.
The diamonds in my wedding rings are from Canada...not all diamonds are mined in questionable circumstances.
This is something that I'm torn about too. SO many factors to consider, especially the insane cost of a nice diamond - but finally I told my bf that even though I'd love a fabulous piece of bling, the most important thing was that it be fair trade. Either from Canada or lab-created or vintage - that ended up being what was most important to me. (of course, I know that's not the case for everyone, and I get that!)
I wanted to make sure I had a conflict free engagement ring so I let my man know that I wanted a vintage ring. He found my ring at a local antique mall and it is absolutely perfect. It is circa 1930's and is so sparkly! I can't wait to read part 2!
Post a Comment